Memoirs of a Tantrika

The Official Blog for Charu, founder of Embody Tantra

Archive for July, 2009

The Easiest & BEST Date-Night EVER! Sunday, Aug 9th

Honor your partnership by spending a special evening connecting and sharing your deep gratitude and love for one another.   Not only will ‘Beginner Tantra for Couples’ class be more adventurous than your typical dinner and a movie…it also has the power to change the dynamic of your relationship, giving you all of the tools you need to begin to approach lovemaking and all aspects of your relating in a new and ‘tantric’ way.

In a long-term relationship it can be difficult to make sure that you are consistently nourishing your love, connection and sex-life…Beginner Tantra for Couples offers a different Tantric meditation experience each month so you can effortlessly add a new dimension to your relating on a monthly basis.

By attending ‘Beginner Tantra for Couples/ Redefining Orgasm’ you are taking an important step towards transforming your sex life, and perhaps even more importantly, you are taking a step towards an intimacy that few couples allow themselves to experience. This intimacy shifts the texture of everything you do in life and allows you to experience what you have truly been longing for in partnership.

This class is literally a step-by-step guide to support you in learning how to:

  • free blocks in your own body that are hindering your capacity for pleasure
  • deeply and intimately connect with your partner in totally ‘out of the box’ (no pun intended) ways
  • learn a simple ritual that will connect you and your partner on a completely new level….one that can immediately be put into practice when you make love

Looking forward to seeing you there!

Beginner Tantra for Couples

Aug 9th 6-8pm

$100 per couple/ Early Bird $75 extended through Midnight TONIGHT!
click here to register

http://embodytantra.ecrater.com/product.php?pid=4317052

…AND GREAT NEWS… I am working on recording these sessions and making them available through an online membership.  This means that if you are not in the Los Angeles area, if the classes don’t fit with your schedule, or if you simply would rather practice and learn Tantra in the comfort of your own home, you will be able to!

Please email me if you are interested in learning more.  I will be offering the first month of membership FREE and if the recording works out for this month’s class (I am not as technically savvy as I would like to be), I will email it to you for you to get a taste of the great pleasure that is possible when you invite Tantra into your relationship.

Hidden Behind Your Conditioned Behavior is the Best Orgasm You Have Ever Had

So much of how we are showing up sexually has been implanted by ideas from our friends, magazines, society.  So little of it is coming from within.  In fact, most of us have no idea how we would behave sexually if we had not been guided by these external forces.  Everything from the idea of what an orgasm should look like, to how often we should have them, to what our lover should do to give them to us, to how big or hard their penis should be or what is the best shape for her breasts.

What I have found is that actually what I have truly been craving sexually, what some small part of me deep inside has been calling for, was actually almost completely different than what I thought I wanted and how I was operating sexually.

For example, I used to be very attached to my explosive clitoral orgasm and I would often get into patterns with the men I was with where I would basically demand that they go down on me and bring me to an orgasm before I took them inside of me.  It was always ‘my turn first’ as it were, and I considered myself to be lucky to have partners who were willing to ‘make sure that I was satisfied’…

As I began to become more in tune with the messages in my body, that began to feel less authentic and I found myself opening up in different ways… I even noticed when I did follow that old pattern, I would become wet, but in some ways my vagina would be tight when I took my lover inside of me, rather than warm and open and receptive.  I noticed that it was when my lover paid attention to my breasts that my vagina would actually become totally receptive so that when I did take him inside of me, I was sensitive to him and I felt like I was inviting him in to a rich landscape.  My vagina would become so sensitive in fact, that I ultimately became orgasmic from the moment he entered my body.

This was a huge shift and it came not only from allowing myself to listen to the messages of my body, but also from giving myself permission to do it differently.  The book Tantric Orgasm for Women played a huge part in me discovering that I was not alone in this and reading it helped me to give myself permission to try things radically differently and say ‘yes’ to the voice inside of me.

Again, it is when we begin to truly connect within that we are able to hear these messages that we have overridden for most of our lives.

Want to use this article? You can as long as you include the following: Charu Morgan has dedicated her life to Tantra. Over the past 10 years she has studied and shared Tantra worldwide. Best-known for her candid Memoirs of a Tantrika blog and her down-to-earth approach, she is committed to educating modern minds on the ancient secrets of Tantra through coaching, events & home-study courses. If you would like to discover how Tantra can Transform your life, register online for the Memoirs of a Tantrika weekly ezine at www.embodytantra.com and receive your free audio report Better Sex, Richer Life through Tantra.

Upcoming Events with Charu

Beginner Tantra for Couples

Sunday August 9th 6pm . Culver City
$100 per couple / $75 when you register before July 26th
click here to register:
http://embodytantra.ecrater.com/product.php?pid=4317052

Evening of Awakening . Puja Ritual
Saturday August 15th 7-11pm
$60 per person / $50 if registered before Aug 1st
click here to learn more & register
http://eveningofawakening.blogspot.com/

The Secret to Great Sex

It has become clear to me that no matter what the exact issue that brings a client through my door, everyone is grasping for the secret to having a deeply fulfilling experience in lovemaking.

People often want to believe or are searching out a technique that, once learned will finally satisfy their partner and transform their experience.

…and there are some techniques out there that are interesting and worth exploring, but the big secret is that great sex does not come from learning something you can ‘do’ differently.  It comes from how intimate you are with yourself.

Our culture has little tolerance for dedicating any time or energy to fully experiencing our bodies because we have become so result oriented.  God forbid we step away from our computer and the possibility of accomplishing one more thing, in order to nourish ourselves!

If we do take the time to nourish ourselves, it comes in the form of a spa treatment, a nice meal out, a ball-game, a Yoga class, etc.  And all of these things are WONDERFUL!  But how many of them really turn you on?  I mean how much of your life touches you in your sex?  Seriously, take a moment to think about it.  When you are not engaged in having sex what percentage of your life are you experiencing the wholeness of yourself including your sexuality?

…I thought so.  Way too little.

The worst part is that we have almost no experience of the potential of our bodies, no relationship to our own sexuality (other than a few goal-oriented masturbation sessions), and yet, we expect our partner to be able to satisfy us and take us to new heights… and if they can’t, we whisper about it to our friends and long for our partner to change.

The good news is that getting in touch with your body and your sexuality is EASY.  Yes, it is.  Whew!  All it takes is a curiosity, an investment in those possibilities that you feel within you, but often don’t listen to.

Try this:

Take the time for a walk in the park or on the beach, while you are there, take a moment to pause and be silent.  Allow yourself to notice what you feel through each sense in your body.  What do you smell?  How does the air feel when it touches your skin?  What colors and shapes do you see?  Sounds do you hear?  Allow yourself to truly absorb all of the sensations of the moment and through this begin to discover something new inside yourself and your relationship to all things.

“All around you, in every moment, The world is offering a feast for your senses.  Songs are playing, tasty food is on the table, Fragrances are in the air, Colors fill the eyes with light.

You who long for union, Attend this banquet with loving focus.  The outer and the inner worlds open to each other…”

~Vighyan Bhirav Tantra as translated by Lorin Roche Ph.D. http://lorinroche.com/

It is so simple that it is almost deceptive because we are not accustomed to allowing life to be simple.

And it is from this place of truly feeling ourselves in a new way, and coming into intimate contact with the world within and without that the great secret to lovemaking is revealed: attunement.

Yup.  No special technique, no following steps 1,2,3 and boom!  As you become more intimate with yourself you will naturally become more intimate with the world.  As you become more intimate with the world you will begin to notice how to simply allow yourself to come into an attunement with this moment in your body.  As you attune to the moment, you become more sensitive to, and can easily attune to your partner.  It is from this place that true lovemaking happens.

As you become more and more sensitive, you will even begin to ‘hear’ what your partners body is telling you.  A longing for a caress here, an invitation for a deeper more vigorous movement, a call to slow down, and so on.  You become one of those rare people that you have heard of in the myths that friends have told you about that past lover who just magically knew what to do, how to touch and who drove them wild.

You can only become aware of these responses in your partner, you can only come into this level of attunement when you have an intimate relationship with yourself.

In many ways you will practice this attunement in every moment of your life.  Life becomes your greatest lover, even just the breath moving in and out of the body is recognized as the sweet pleasure that it is, and sharing with another human being is a delicious expression of this loving.

Want to use this article? You can as long as you include the following: Charu Morgan has dedicated her life to Tantra. Over the past 10 years she has studied and shared Tantra worldwide.  Best-known for her candid Memoirs of a Tantrika blog and her down-to-earth approach, she is committed to educating modern minds on the ancient secrets of Tantra through coaching, events & home-study courses.  If you would like to discover how Tantra can Transform your life, register online for the Memoirs of a Tantrika weekly ezine at www.embodytantra.com and receive your free audio report Better Sex, Richer Life through Tantra.

Upcoming Events with Charu

Beginner Tantra for Couples

Sunday August 9th 6pm . Culver City
$100 per couple / $75 when you register before July 26th
click here to register:


Evening of Awakening . Puja Ritual

Saturday August 15th 7-11pm
$60 per person / $50 if registered before Aug 1st
click here to learn more & register
http://eveningofawakening.blogspot.com/

Stillness in Lovemaking (and a secret lasting longer in bed)

I have said it before, and I will say it again… the bodies have a language of their own.  Most of us have stopped listening when our bodies talk and because of that we have suffered.  We have suffered because we have isolated ourselves, not only from each other, but most importantly from ourselves.

The other day my man and I were making love and he paused, as he often does, and rested inside of me.  With him resting inside my body I began to receive information from his body into mine.  An entire symphony of information.  It felt like a blooming, it began from his penis and then spread out through my body… reaching to the top of my scull and the tips of my toes, pressing against the inside of my skin to the outer edges of me.

He began to move again and it was as though the information withdrew or pulled back as he pulled back to thrust into me.  It was startling and unsettling.  As he continued to move gently in and out of me I noticed that I was consistently experiencing this unsettled sensation of trying to receive the information, but not being able to ‘pin it down’ or absorb it.  Fascinating.

Now, I there are other times when he is moving and I can fully receive what his body is sharing with me, and other languages where I can feel the building of fullness with the intense movement… moments where the way that he is penetrating me feels almost blinding and that feeling of losing control is profound in its own way…

And yet, this experience, which I have often had, of longing for him to stay still so I could drink in this deep knowledge of my man, inspired me to share with the world how important these moments of pause can be.

Many of us are caught in a habitual loop of feeling that we always have to ‘do’ something in lovemaking.  That there is some great technique that will wow our lover and make them love and approve of us or satisfy them beyond belief.  And sometimes within that we are missing the simple magic.  We are railroading over the very connection that we so long for, the connection that nourishes and enlivens.  The connection where two human beings actually enter into a union and open to one another.  Perhaps open and share in a way that is not possible with words or in daily interactions (as we know them).

So, I would like to invite you all to explore the stillness.  Allow it to teach you about what is possible between two bodies as it re-sensitizes you to the moment.

Men ~ it is important to understand that I have just exposed a valuable secret to lasting longer in bed… when/if you feel you are moving toward ejaculation and you would like to postpone it… don’t leave your woman by thinking of baseball or whatever techniques you have created to repress the energy.  Simply allow your body to relax, be still.  Yes, your erection may shift and change while you are still, you may not be as hard as when you are thrusting… this is okay.

Take this time to look your woman in the eyes, caress her body and allow yourself and her to simply relish in the connection between the two bodies.  When and if it feels right to move again you can, as the bond between you has ripened you may notice a new richness as you move inside of her.  You may even notice that your penis is more sensitive to what her body is truly longing for.  Within lovemaking you can pause as many times as you like and you may even choose to experiment with completing your lovemaking this way, simply allowing the charge you have built from moving the bodies to nourish you rather than ending with a big explosion.

There is no ‘right’ way to make love.  Explosions are wonderful, fucking is wonderful… and now you can begin to explore this concept of stillness and see what the process reveals to you about lovemaking and the possibilities.

Want to use this article? You can as long as you include the following: Charu Morgan has dedicated her life to Tantra. Over the past 10 years she has studied and shared Tantra worldwide.  Best-known for her candid Memoirs of a Tantrika blog and her down-to-earth approach, she is committed to educating modern minds on the ancient secrets of Tantra through events, workshops & home-study courses.  If you would like to discover how Tantra can Transform your life, register online for the Memoirs of a Tantrika weekly ezine at www.embodytantra.com and receive your free audio report Better Sex, Richer Life through Tantra.

How to Unlock Your Potential for Pleasure

FREE Teleclass for Women

When: Friday, July 10th 1pm PST/ 2pm MST/ 4pm EST

How to Unlock Your Potential for Pleasure OVERNIGHT and Re-discover Richness & Passion in Your Relationship to Yourself, Your Loved Ones & Your Life!

As many of you know, I have dedicated my life to the study and practice of Tantra. I have seen the Tantric practices simply, almost magically transform the lives and relationships of many, many people. You will learn the tools that have been practiced for thousands of years to simply and effectively tune into the deep wisdom of the body and effortlessly allow that wisdom to become a guiding force in your life.

On the 75-minute call, you’ll discover:

* The exact tools you can use immediately to clear blocks in your body and awaken a flow of orgasmic energy accessible to you in EVERY moment….in just one Tantra session I have seen these tools; save couples relationships, free women from pain or numbness during intercourse, shift body-image issues, and literally awaken the beauty in every woman I have shared them with.

* How these practices will easily break through deep-rooted habitual patterns – in a way that will integrate shifts and changes into your life immediately – something that many therapists & healers are unaware of

* How to uncover an inner wisdom that has been all but lost in our modern culture. Yes, right now you have untapped information you aren’t even aware of…After this call, you’ll know what reveals this wisdom and how to live with ease, heal your body and have better sex by ‘tuning in’ to it.

* How to move beyond your limited experience of pleasure. Even if you are sexually savvy or you are having great sex, what is possible within your body is rarely understood or experienced in our modern times

* The very best part of unlocking your potential for pleasure has very little to do with the great sex you will be having- that is the gravy – the best part is the fulfillment, the confidence, the aliveness and the love you experience within yourself

In love,
Charu

How to Register

Space is limited for the “How to Unlock Your Potential for Pleasure OVERNIGHT and Re-discover Richness & Passion in Your Relationship to Yourself, Your Loved Ones & Your Life!” teleseminar so register by clicking this link now:

http://potentialforpleasure.blogspot.com/

PS– This call could be a turning point in your life – the moment you release who you think you should be and wake up to the woman that you are.

In Tantric Relationship, The Honeymoon Never Ends…

Some of you may know that today I celebrate four years with my incredible man!  It is so amazing to share with a man so dynamically and fully.  Of course, I credit Tantra for giving me the tools and the context for showing up and allowing the relationship to undo me, rather than make me smaller or box me in.

I think there are a few major mistakes that we all make when it comes to relationship:

One thing is that we think relationship is there to make us happy… of course relationships can awaken us to joy and happiness, but anyone who has been in one knows that is not all there is to it.

In Tantra, it is thought that a Tantric relationship is one which specifically provokes old family dynamics and habitual responses. Within a conscious, Tantric relationship we are given the opportunity to meet those ‘trigger points’ head-on, learn how to stay present within them, and open to a new, perhaps unfamiliar way of showing up.

A way that is beyond ‘trading needs’ and that takes us into uncharted territory where I don’t count on my partner to ‘complete me’ as we see in so many movies, I go deeper with my partner by honoring myself, knowing myself and loving beyond my fear of losing.

This requires great courage and when you show up for relationship in this way, it can be the greatest teacher, perhaps the only teacher you will ever need.

I am not the woman I was four years ago.  Throughout this relationship I have become aware of some very limiting patterns that I have been ruled by for most of my life…because of my strong Tantric practice both before and during my relationship, I have broken through many layers that have kept true, authentic love at bay.  I am consistently surprised by what is possible between two people and by the true beauty of man.

When relating is dynamic in this way, and nourished in a foundation of a deep honor and respect for yourself AND your partner, the honeymoon never ends.  Every moment is a delicious surprise, you are consistently challenged and invited into new landscape.  Passion, desire and absolute love live here.

Want to use this article?  You can as long as you include the following: Charu Morgan has dedicated her life to Tantra. Over the past 10 years she has studied and shared Tantra worldwide.  Best-known for her candid Memoirs of a Tantrika blog and her down-to-earth approach, she is committed to educating modern minds on the ancient secrets of Tantra through events, workshops & home-study courses.  If you would like to discover how Tantra can Transform your life, register online for the Memoirs of a Tantrika weekly ezine at www.embodytantra.com and receive your free audio report Better Sex, Richer Life through Tantra.